If you're a planner, you'll understand this post

I don't have any big fundraiser updates today. But just to refresh:

The Quartermania is our next BIG event. It's July 19 and we NEED TWENTY people to show up and sign in saying we invited you!! TWENTY!!! We will be selling hot dogs and chips and drinks as well!
AND... If I invited you and you RSVP to me or on facebook, and of course you show up, I will put your name in a drawing for A ROLL OF QUARTERS!!! If you bring someone who I DID NOT invite, then I will put your name in the drawing a SECOND time. If  you bring TWO people who weren't invited by me, I will put your name in a total of THREE times. And so on!
http://www.facebook.com/#!/events/323181907770785/


We will be doing a raffle for donated items, and two of those items are our ORNAMENTS!!! If you can't make it to the quartermania or you want specific ornaments, you can see/order them here:
http://www.facebook.com/#!/events/391032197620614/

The Pampered Chef link will be up and posted soon!

AND we are collecting for the AUGUST GARAGE SALE!! Let me know if  you've got stuff you'd like to donate! We made $878 from the last minute one. Let's make even more than that this time!!!


Now, an update as to where we are right now...
Last week we needed $2366 (after the Crawl match) to reach $10,000. We've gotten orders for ornaments that will give us profit of $259. Which means we need $2107!!!! HOW AWESOME IS THAT?!?!?!?! I just can't believe it!!!!! And we have ALL OF YOU to thank for it!! Thank you thank you, THANK YOU. We are ALMOST there. Help us reach our goal by our birthday month (September)!!! :)


Another way you can help us, and help ALL infertile couples... Is by signing this! Just fill out your information, and type in a quick little message to your representative about why you feel strongly about this bill (which gives a small tax credit for all the expenses paid for fertility treatment). https://secure2.convio.net/res/site/Advocacy?cmd=display&page=UserAction&id=371


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Today I'm going to post about holidays. If you're a planner, you'll understand this post. If you're not, you're probably going to think I've lost my mind. I assure you, I haven't. But these are the types of things that go through my mind DAILY, because I'm always planning planning planning. I don't like to be surprised and I'm not exactly one that just goes with the flow.


Having said that... The one thing in life I've always wanted to NOT plan is pregnancy. I wanted to be married to Danny of course. But other than that I just wanted it to happen. No trying. I wanted to just wake up one day and realize my cycle wasn't quite right, take a test, and then be able to surprise Danny with the amazingly wonderful news.
Well, that doesn't get to happen. I don't exactly get to SURPRISE Danny with the news that I'm pregnant when that time comes. Really we don't get to surprise ANYONE. Everyone is going to know what's going on, every step of the way. You all helped us get this far (and will be helping to get us to 10k), so you deserve to be in the know. I can't keep that from you. PLUS all the extra prayers and good vibes will be needed and appreciated. So, there's no surprise there...
I guess what the surprise will be for YOU all, is if there's just a singleton in there or twins. I suppose that's something we can keep from you and plan a surprising way to announce it. Hmm. Decision made!!!

The lack of surprise/announcement has been on my mind a lot. Among other things...

I recently read an article on Babble by PIWTPITT (http://www.peopleiwanttopunchinthethroat.com/) about Christmas pins starting to show up again on Pinterest. I had noticed this, yes. AND I was guilty of pinning a ridiculous amount of Christmas crafts and ideas... in July. I'm not ashamed. I would listen to Christmas music 365 days a year if I could get away with it. I would leave our Christmas tree up year-round if Danny wasn't whole-heartedly against it. I love EVERYTHING about Christmas. The smells. The decorations. The lights. The FEEL of Christmas. Everyone is in a giving mood. Everyone is caring. Christmas is the best day of the year! So yeah, when it's 110 degrees outside, I'm going to WISH for the cold days of Christmas, and everything the goes with it...

From there I started thinking about this Christmas. This could be our last Christmas as a family of three!! This could be the last Christmas where Faith will be the only kiddo with gifts under the tree. I could be PREGNANT by this Christmas!!! If we can get started in August/September, I could be almost THREE MONTHS ALONG this Christmas!! I would have a little bump by then!! I could be SHOWING in our Christmas pictures.
I can just see it now... A family picture of the three of us around our beautiful Christmas tree (adorned with the wonderful Christmas in July Fundraiser Ornaments), with a little belly bump showing and the whole family just glowing with happiness... Can you see it?
2012 is our year to have Faith the afternoon/evening of Christmas. Which means in 2013, she gets to wake up at our house. We could have a bigger family by then. And she'd get to wake up with her younger siblings at our house on their FIRST Christmas!!! <3

From there my thoughts go to my second favorite day... Black Friday. I go every year. I have ever since I was 12. I've never missed a year, including the year I was on crutches. One year I got bruised ribs (got rammed with a cart full of TVs, while I was waiting in line in front of my cart which was full of just about everything). Many years I've gotten bruises. Elbowed in the side/ribs/face/arms. Black Friday isn't for the weak...
I could be pregnant by Black Friday this year. I couldn't participate in that sort of CRAZINESS while pregnant!!! Not considering the injuries I've ALREADY suffered in the melee I love so much. I told Danny this. And he looked at me like I'd grown three heads.
"But you'll only be like... a month or two pregnant..." Well DUH!!! that's a scary time! I've decided that men just don't get it. That's still in the "not safe not safe not safe" time in the pregnancy when miscarriage rates are still so high. I won't risk it to save $5. I won't risk it to save $500. BUT, I will still go. I will just stay with the cart. I must go,  you see, because I'm the planner. I've got the lists, I've got the stores plotted out, and I've got Danny and my family all posted up in the correct areas of the store to get us ALL everything that we're after. I can't give that up. It's not a control thing. Okay, maybe it is. But I spend well over a month planning this ONE DAY (which has become one NIGHT, Thanksgiving Thursday, don't get me started on THAT... ughh...) and I've never NOT gotten everything important on my list, or a rain check for it. We bust our rears to get everything that everyone in our group needs, even when we split the stores up. And I can't just say "sorry, can't do it." Okay, maybe I can. My family would understand, and they may try to force me to stay home and out of possible harm's way. BUT I will be staying by the cart, calling everyone and checking in constantly. Still in control, but far away from flying elbows and carts full of TVs.

Going backward from there my thoughts go to Halloween. This year is our year to have Faith that evening. We could be walking around the neighborhood collecting candy, and I could be PREGNANT!!! I could be carrying around a baby (or two?) at that time!! How CRAZY would that be? I wouldn't be showing of course. And I may not even KNOW if I'm pregnant at that time. But I could be. Amazing....

And then of course there's September... Danny's birthday is the 1st. Mine is the 30th. Could we possibly be DOING the IVF that month?! Or just the prep work for it? I could see Danny getting close to my stomach to give me a shot now...
"Happy Birthday babe... Now don't scream when I stab you with this disgustingly sharp needle this time!!" Ha. Ha. Ha. Yeah... I'm now to the point where I'm sort of freaking out about that whole thing...


I'm also to the point where I worry that it won't work. Or that I'll have a chemical pregnancy. Or that I'll miscarry. The facts are facts and they are SCARY. I try to forget them. I try to think positively. I have this whole time. I've always said "Oh yeah, I'm sure it'll only take one time... Yeah... Surely..." And now that the time is HERE. Now that it's so close to becoming a reality.... Well now is when I'm starting to think "What if it doesn't work?" I'm thinking all of these thoughts about when the due date would be depending on when we'd do the IVF, about being pregnant this year, about celebrating holidays with a baby bump.... And it might not end up like that. God may have other plans. And it scares me more than I can say... That just drives home the fact that we will need EVERY SINGLE prayer we can get. We need all the good vibes and sticky thoughts sent our way when we are going through one of the craziest/hardest months of our lives. We'll be counting on you guys! And I can't wait to share it ALL with you!!!