Welcome Sweet Baby Girl!!!

RYSSA IS HERE!!! SHE'S HERE SHE'S HERE!!!

Sorry for the lack of updates. Especially if you're not on our facebook and therefore haven't seen the news. But... SHE IS HERE!!! Three days after my last post, she made her debut into this world!! Which is why I haven't been able to update. How anyone has time to do anything with a new baby in the home is beyond me. I don't want to put her down! But... I did. Just so I could type this up. I'm hoping I can get it done before her next feeding, but there's not much time between them these days so I've got to type fast!!

Want to hear the birth story? Not all the nitty gritty. Basically just the lead up to and a few small details about the birth itself?? If not, I'd stop reading if I were you. Because here goes!

Some of you know how absolutely petrified I was about going to the hospital thinking I was in labor just to get sent home. Why was I so afraid? Well because I just thought that would stink, for one. And also because my mom threatened me about it, haha. I was so scared, as a matter of fact, that I had a nightmare about it... Want to hear about it? It was Monday night, the 15th. And I was having the usual nightly contractions that didn't go away in the warm bathtub, but I knew they weren't close enough together to go to the hospital. But it was still in the back of my mind. I went to bed. And woke up in a cold sweat. I had a dream that we decided to go to the hospital to get checked out because of those contractions... Hung out for a bit... And were sent home. We were disappointed about it, but my nurse was super sweet. She sent Danny to get the car and she walked me outside... Only as soon as we walked outside we were in the middle of nowhere and then all of a sudden a guy was chasing me and the nurse with a chainsaw!! I couldn't figure out how to protect my belly and run and the guy caught me and chopped off my hair (what the heck??) and then started going for my legs, I'd already fallen and was trying to curl around my belly, and then.... I woke up. SO SUPER FREAKY.
The next day, Tuesday, I was telling my friend Jamie about the bizarre dream. And we decided it really showed how scared I was of being sent home from the hospital because it wasn't time. I then looked up the dream meaning in a dream dictionary and it said "To see a chainsaw in your dream indicates that something drastic is about to happen." Ohhh really?? Well, that was exciting at least...

For days my dogs had been acting weird. Pixie would sit and STARE at us. Not blinking at all. Just staring. Staring staring staring. Zeus wouldn't leave my side. Zeus generally doesn't care much about being by me. He loves attention from anyone and is excited almost all of the time and doesn't sit still. But the days before, he wouldn't leave me. Always in my feet or with his head touching me. I tried to google if other people's dogs were acting weird before labor kicked in, and as usual with google, I found people who said their animals did and others that said their animals acted no different. So. No big light bulb there.

Tuesday at work I was pretty miserable. My tailbone hurt. My contractions were there but not bad enough to warrant leaving work or going to the hospital. My mom came out of her office and REQUESTED THAT I NOT GO INTO LABOR THAT NIGHT because she needed some rest. I laughed at her, but really didn't think I'd be going into "real" labor any time soon. I just wanted it to be baby doc appointment day so I could see if I had made any progress at all.

That evening I wanted comfort food. Panera, mac n cheese. And I wanted ice cream, from Braums. I just wanted yummy fave foods after feeling so awful all day. So that's what we did. When we got home my contractions kicked up again, right on time. And I got in the tub. The tub didn't make them go away. Quite opposite in fact. I decided to get out and lay in bed, on my side. I knew something was off as soon as I laid down. Things just didn't feel normal, they didn't feel right. I was feeling more pressure than ever... and I was scared. Danny was in the living room playing his game and I just felt like I needed him in our room with me. I couldn't be alone. I NEEDED him in there. So I asked him to please finish up his game and get in there. He turned his game off and came in there with me and asked what was wrong. I told him and he asked if we needed to go to the hospital, which of course I refused because I was terrified.
And then the contractions got bad. I was playing a game on my phone and I just couldn't handle it anymore. I couldn't play the game. I couldn't think. I could do nothing other than try to deal with the pain and pressure. Danny made the call, we were headed to the hospital. I grabbed my bag, which didn't have the last minute items in it that I had planned on throwing in on the way out the door. Oh well. I grabbed the camera. And we were off. I sent a quick text to some people telling them we were heading in and that I would let them know if they were keeping me.

Danny drove us to the birthing center. We parked. My paperwork all said to leave everything in the car, so we put everything in the trunk except my hospital gown, which I clutched like a lifeline.  We walked in and got checked in, and a nurse came and got us. We went to room 14, She handed me a gown to change into.
"Ummm, actually, I brought my own if that's okay?"
"You brought your own hospital gown?"
"Yeah..."
"Well... Okay I guess." Geez, rude much?
She left to get me some water and let me change. Danny helped me, as I was in the middle of a contraction. And then I sat up on the bed. The nurse came back and hooked me up to some monitors, and explained to Danny what they did. I tried to listen. I didn't catch much. They watched my contractions. Every 5-10 minutes. The nurse took some more info and then left us alone. I tried to lay there and relax, but it was hard. My friend Janice told me to relax through the contractions by not clenching up my hands and arms and such. So I tried desperately to not clench. I still clenched. At the 30 minute mark the nurse came back in and asked if I wanted to walk around. I did, but I didn't want to walk the halls. I just wanted to walk around the room. So that's what I did... And the contractions almost stopped. Sitting up and/or walking just basically cut them off. I had a few more, and they were ROUGH ones, and I tried shaking my arms so I wouldn't clench. I tried leaning on the bed to get relief. Nothing worked. The nurse came back at the 1 hour mark to check me.
"No change..." Yeah, because I was walking and that slowed everything down. I was doing better when I was laying down relaxing...
"Okay... So. Now what?"
"Well I will call your doctor to see if she wants us to keep you or see if you can go home." If I can go home? I don't want to go home. I CAN SEE MY CONTRACTIONS. THEY ARE REAL. KEEP ME HERE.
She left the room and I looked over at Danny... I knew this was it, I knew they were going to send me home. Exactly what I wanted to avoid...

And in walked the nurse...
"Okay I talked to Dr ___."
"Dr who??"
"Dr ___, he's the on call dr, your doc isn't on call tonight." That doctor isn't even at College Hill. Who is that doctor? I DON'T EVEN KNOW THAT PERSON.
"Okay..."
"And he said you can go home. He said to give you an Ambien so you can sleep." No. Absolutely not. Does he want me to sleep through my entire labor and give birth at home??
"Do I have to? I can't handle meds well. And I am sure that's too strong."
"Well, it's that or Benedryl. It's just so you can get some rest. The rest will probably stop your contractions..." No it won't, resting is what makes them worse... "OR, it will relax your body and allow the contractions to do the work they are supposed to be doing." That makes slightly more sense...
"Okay. Well, just the benedryl then."

The nurse went to get my benedryl and I looked at Danny, who looked downright irate.
"So what are we supposed to wait for then? Your contractions are close enough for you to be here. What are we supposed to do at home?" Good questions...
"I don't know love..."
The nurse came back with my benedryl, and Danny asked her these questions.
"Well, you guys can come back when the contractions are 3-7 minutes apart. Right now they are 4-9." Seriously? They need to be ONE MINUTE CLOSER TOGETHER for me to come back? What is the POINT of going home??
"Okay."
"Or if she starts bleeding. Not spotting, spotting is normal since I checked her..." I've never spotted from being checked before, why would I now?
"So we will probably be back tonight, then?"
"Well this benedryl will either stop the contractions completely and you won't be back for days or weeks, or it'll kick it all into high gear and I'll see you in two hours..."

Ha....

We went home. I called my mom and told her we got sent home. I told her what the doctor gave me, and who the doctor was. Which ticked her off because he was the doctor that delivered two of my nephews and she didn't like him. Heck, after giving me a benedryl and sending me home, I DIDN'T LIKE HIM EITHER.
We went home and I just wanted to sleep. Sleep? Right... Benedryl generally knocks me the heck out. But not that night. As soon as I got into bed, BAM, hard core intense contractions. So so bad. Oh gosh they hurt.
Danny fell asleep next to me so I tried to be quiet and deal with them, since obviously they weren't "real" or whatever. Contraction, sleep, contraction, sleep, contraction, no sleep, contraction, try to catch a breath, contraction....
"Danny, I can't do this..."
"Babe, it's a little late for that. You kinda have to." I need meds. I need more than a benedryl. I NEED RELIEF.
Contraction... breathe... contraction... breathe... contraction, can't catch my breath...
"That's it..." Oh, he's still awake?
"What?"
"Those aren't even 3 minutes apart. We are going back." Oh my gosh I felt like they were close but I thought that was just me...
"Okay..."
I got out of bed and changed clothes, Danny put his contacts back in... And while I was standing up, guess what? No contractions. We got into the car, I called my mom, who didn't answer...
"My mom isn't answering... Ugh..." CONTRACTION... Nausea. Oh good gracious don't throw up in the car don't throw up in the car don't throw up in the car... Whew. Done. Relief.
I tried calling my mom again, and this time she woke up and answered. We talked, through a couple contractions, and she said this was the real thing, especially with the nausea. She was ready to head to the hospital right then. I told her to wait.
The rest of the way to the hospital wasn't bad. The contractions almost stopped completely. Danny noticed.
"Why do they stop when we're in the car? Or when you're standing up? They were so close when we were laying down... They're going to send us home again...."
I couldn't think, so I couldn't answer...

We made it back to the birthing center... And a few steps from the car, I lost it. And by "it," I mean my dinner, or dessert, or the water I was drinking all night. I don't know. I just know I threw up the whole way to the front door. Danny offered to get me a wheel chair and I refused, I could walk... It would just take a while and I needed breaks.
We finally made it inside and the same receptionist seemed happy to see us back.
"Back again? Are we ready this time?"
"Yeah... and uhh... I need something to throw up in..."
A look of panic went over the lady's face... but instead of getting me a bucket or a trash can or anything, she got my paperwork. Danny sat me down on a couch and went to look for something for me to puke into, while I tried to breathe AND NOT PUKE. He had to stop and sign my papers for me. And by then the nurse was there to get us. She got a wheel chair, and loaded me up. While I again tried not to puke....

This time we went to room 20. Danny had to help me into my hospital gown and pack away my clothes. I couldn't function. I couldn't do anything. All I could do was try to breathe through the contractions, that took everything from me.
The nurse hooked me up to the monitors and she and Danny gawked at how much more intense the contractions were. She checked me, and I was at a 4.
"Congratulations, today is the day. You are at a 4 and are in active labor. You can have your epidural any time now if you want it."
"Now. I want it now. Please."
She called the lady for my epi while another nurse came in.
"Hey Destiny, I'm ___. I looked through your chart. This is an IVF baby?" It says that in my chart? What chart? The chart that would have just gotten started a few hours ago when we were here? Where does it SAY this stuff at??
"Yeah, yeah she's an IVF baby..."
"I know how that goes... Wanting a baby so bad and having to have help. My baby was an IUI baby. Not quite as invasive... but still hard work." Oh. Wow. I love this lady already.
"Aww, congratulations on your baby. Did you do your treatments here?"
We talked a bit, between contractions when I could function, about who her dr was here. She had a dr that a good friend of mine is seeing now, which made me feel good. I really bonded with her. I knew her shift would change in less than 2 hours but I wanted her to stay there with me the whole time. She rocked my socks.

The lady with the magical medicine came and talked to me about the epidural, the risks, etc. I was set up to get my IV and she was going next door to check on another patient, and I'd get my epi when she got back... She was back within minutes because the patient next door had already delivered. She'd only been there an hour before me!!! So this lady stuck around until my IV was in and I was ready for the epi.
"I do have one question. Just one."
"Okay, what's that?"
"Will this thing RUN OUT?!"
"Ohh no. If it gets close, we just add more. Don't you worry about that."
"Okay, good. That was my only fear."
And then it was time. I had to sit on the edge of the bed and hang my arms down. Danny sat in front of me and I rested my feet on his legs... And then I had to puke.
"I'm gonna throw up..."
"NOT ON ME" and WHOOSH Danny shot back. My favorite nurse turned away, too... But to get me something to throw up in. I can't even remember if I threw up or just dry heaved. But eventually I was ready for the epidural.
Don't move Destiny, don't move. You watched video of this, you know what to expect. Don't move. Don't move.
I was shaking from the contractions, literally shivering. And BAM I felt a pinch/burn/SOMETHING and I had no control over my body because it was in the middle of a contraction and I was shivering and I jerked. Everyone freaked out, I freaked out. Danny put me in a vise hold basically, and my nurse grabbed a hold of me. She told me to squeeze her arm. So I did. I have sharp nails so I KNOW I was hurting her. So instead of focusing on anything else, I could only focus on what I was doing to her poor arm. But I couldn't let go either.
"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so sorry I'm hurting your arm I'm so so sorry I'm so sorry."
"Shhh it's okay, don't worry about it. It's fine."  No it's not, why can't I let go?? Gosh!
"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."
Done. We're done. There's no more burning. It's over. But I still feel the contractions. How long does this take to work? I NEED RELIEF MY GOSH.
"We're just going to tape everything down now."
"How long until this kicks in?"
"It will be in effect in about 20 minutes." Whew, 20 minutes. I need to hang on for 20 minutes.

Not even 5 minutes later I was checked again.
I couldn't have done much in the 30 minutes or so it had been since being checked before, right? Especially since I could still feel everything going on... Maybe I'll be at a 5 or 6 now. Wouldn't that be crazy...
"Okay, you are at an 8, 100% effaced."
"What?"
"What?"
"What?!"
Yeah, nobody in that room believed what they heard from the nurse who checked me.
"Yeah, an 8. It's going quick."
OH. MY. GOSH. I have got to tell everyone so they don't miss this!!!!
I sent a text, and got some pretty funny responses. Danny's sister couldn't believe I was still texting (I wasn't for much longer after that), everyone else was afraid they wouldn't make it. Our amazing friend and photographer was hauling rear to get there so she wouldn't miss anything...

It was only a few minutes later when people starting filing in. Family, friends. Everyone. Surrounded by love and comfort... My epi had kicked in and I had some relief, although I could still feel immense pressure with each contraction, it wasn't pain. Just hard to breathe through. And I was beyond exhausted since I had only gotten about 10 minutes of sleep between contractions at home.
A lady came in to ask me some questions and she talked very quietly. Too quietly. And it was far too loud in my room. I couldn't hear her, and I couldn't hear myself think about any answers I needed to be telling her. So I sort of snapped about it being too loud. Instant quiet...
We finished our q and a session, and I asked her if MY doctor would be doing my delivery since it was now business hours so she wouldn't have to be the on call doc. She said yes, and she left. A bit later a nurse (my fave nurse was long gone) asked that everyone leave the room so I could nap. Oh sweet sweet relief to my ears, A NAP. I would need energy and I wouldn't have it if I couldn't get some sleep. So out everyone went. I had someone in there with me at all times, but people took turns and those that were in there were quiet. At one point my mom was in there and was asking how I was doing.
"Mom I can't do this. I can't do this with all those people in here."
"What?! Destiny, you've got to decide that quick. So they know and you aren't saying so as you are about to push."
"I just, I couldn't even hear that one lady. And I couldn't think. And there was just too much going on. I have to be able to concentrate, I have to be able to THINK. I have to have energy. And I can't do that when the whole room is that loud."
"I know. But when it comes time for that, believe me, nobody is going to be chatting away. Everyone will also be focused on the same thing you're focused on."
"I don't know. They can be in there for now. But if it gets loud, I'll tell them to get out."
"That's fine Des."
"Ugh...."
I asked my nurse if I could turn to my left side. That was most comfortable.
"Sure. It's best to keep you flipping back and forth anyway. It keeps the progress going."
So she and my mom helped me flip...
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEEEEEEP
What on earth... What's wrong? Did a wire come loose?
"Destiny I need you to flip back over, FAST." Oh my God. That's Ryssa. Something is wrong. Something is wrong with her. I CAN'T GET FLIPPED OVER.
"I need help."
"Come on, we've got to get you over fast..." Fast fast fast, I need to do this fast, dang it, Rys PLEASE BE OKAY.
Finally I got back to my right side. I was uncomfortable, but the beeping stopped. I couldn't see the monitor, but the nurse said she was fine now. Her heart rate had plummeted.
"Does that mean the cord is wrapped around her neck?"
"Ummm, not necessarily. But if it is, that's totally normal. They handle that daily. Really, it happens more often than not. Now here's the oxygen. Keep this on." Oh dear lord, please let this be a safe delivery. Please let Rys be okay and STAY okay.
Flash flash flash. The lights were flickering over on the wall opposite my bed. Nobody was near the switch, and none of the other lights flickered at all...
"What the heck?"
"Mom, what was that?"
"I don't know..."
"Mom..."
"What?"
"I bet it was uncle Ray... Doing something silly when I'm just about to lose my mind. Letting me know it'll be okay..."
"That wouldn't surprise me at all. You know if he was still alive, he'd be up here too."


I slept on and off for a long time. They ended up having to break my water and I went from an 8 to a 7 1/2. The doctor that broke my water looked younger than me. He probably was younger than me. I vaguely remember getting checked again and I was at a 9. And then before long people had started filtering back in. It was getting loud again. They wanted to check me again so the room cleared out. I was at a 10!!! My nurse called my dr, who was doing a C-section. Official orders were to let me "labor down" and start pushing at 11:15.
It's almost time!! I AM ABOUT TO HAVE A BABY!!!!

That's when things got a little crazy. People starting filing in, other nurses and people and this "push team" I think is what the lady said. And I didn't know where Danny was. He wasn't in there. I would be pushing in 10 minutes, did he know they said I'd start pushing at 11:15??
My dad was by my head at the time before he had to leave the room, but I wanted my HUSBAND.
"Where the ___ is my husband?!"
"He's coming..."
"Does he know I am going to be pushing in a few minutes?!"
"Yes, he will be right here."
And then the nausea hit. Along with the tears. Before I knew it, Danny was there, in my face. Telling me to get control. Telling me to breathe. Instant relief. Everything would be okay, Danny was there....

Beep beep beep...
"What's that?"
"That machine right there..." MY EPIDURAL MACHINE?!?!
"Yeah, you're out..."
"MY EPIDURAL RAN OUT?!?!"
"It's okay, it stays in you for 2 hours so you don't need any more, you won't feel this." Unless I push for more than two hours which is entirely possible!!

Practice pushing came next, just after 11:20. The push team told me what to do, and at my next contraction it was time to put it into action. Contraction, breathe, push once for 8 seconds, take a breath, push for 8 seconds, take a breath, push for 8 seconds. That third and final push? Cue vomit. My mom was shoving a bucket at my face but it was jamming into my neck so I couldn't breathe and I couldn't throw up. I'm pretty sure that bucket almost decapitated me. And I said so. She switched out the big bucket for a different one (no help from the nurses on this front, my mom had to do all that by herself. Nice).
"I suck at this..." I can't even push without throwing up. Seriously. I suck.
And then I felt the urge to push again.
"I feel like I need to push. I need to push."
"Okay, go ahead sweetie." Go ahead? You nurses aren't even over here!
The panic must have showed on my face, Kristy and Jessica shot forward and grabbed my legs (where the nurses had been before but had disappeared from). I had told them they could be in the room if they stayed back and didn't get a good view. Boy did that change when it came time to push and no nurse was near to help me.
I pushed. And I threw up. And I couldn't breathe.
If I can't breathe... That means I'm not getting oxygen. If I'm not getting oxygen... Rys isn't getting oxygen. Oh my gosh I'm just making this all worse!! She already had an issue getting oxygen and now I suck and can't stop throwing up and it's going to make her lose oxygen!! WHAT AM I DOING?!
"Is she okay?! IS SHE OKAY??"
"Yes, hun, she's fine. She's fine. We can see it on the monitor, she's fine."
I. Suck. At. This. Get control Destiny damn it...
"She's got hair!" SHE'S GOT HAIR?! No way!! I didn't really believe it on the sonograms!! No way!!
"REALLY?! Are you sure?? She's really got hair?!" And I cried...
They offered me a mirror. I cussed before loudly saying no, which got a good laugh out of everyone in the room. They asked Danny if he wanted to see. I clutched his hand even tighter and MORE LOUDLY said no. Not cool. I didn't want him to see that!
My doctor showed up and got dressed. She wanted me to push 4 times instead of 3.
Four times?? I threw up during the third push before... How am I going to do four?!
But I did... I did 4 pushes.
"GREAT, one more time." One more time? I've only done like 3 rounds of pushes so far... One more time?? Is she lying to keep me motivated?
My contraction came and Danny was counting for me and I pushed with every ounce of my being. One more time, she said? Well one more time it was going to be.
"Okay DON'T PUSH DON'T PUSH." Don't push? What is she doing down there? What's going on? And then THERE SHE WAS. There was my baby girl... Who wasn't crying...
"Is she okay? Why isn't she crying? Is she okay??"
"She's fine, she's fine. Give her a second... Is Daddy cutting the cord?"
"Yes..."
Wait, where is Daddy? He's not by my head anymore... Oh, down there by Ryssa. Cutting the cord. What an amazing sight...
And THEN SHE CRIED. And cried and cried.
"11:50 am."

They put her right on me, rubbed her clean while she laid on my chest. No longer crying, but staring at me with beautiful, curious-looking eyes. I bawled and bawled.
This is my baby. This is the baby we worked so hard for. This is our baby. THIS IS MY BABY. Oh thank you God for this amazing little angel!!
Then it was time for skin to skin so they moved the towel they had placed her on, and continued doing whatever it was they do. Danny was by my head again, getting a good look at our amazing daughter.
Dr Cox finished up and came up to the head of the bed. She stuck her hand on Ryssa's back.
"You did great! Now I'm guessing... 6 pounds 2 ounces!" And then she was gone.

An hour of skin to skin. An hour of bonding with my baby with nobody else getting to take her away from me. An hour of her staring at me or being comforted by me. Absolutely amazing.

Eventually it was time for her weight and measurements. I closed my gown back up and twisted around so I could see.....
"6 pounds, 1.8 ounces, which the computer will automatically round to 6 pounds 2 ounces." HOLY CRAP Dr Cox was right!!! How did she do that?!
After the nurse was done getting Rys all taken care of, she handed her to Daddy. Cue more tears.


It was such an amazing day. I know I'm forgetting things... I will probably come back and edit this as I remember more little bits, so I have it for ever and ever.
Thank you all, for all of your support over the last year and a half. And for those of you who have been with us from day one. All of you. Thank you. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts. This baby girl is more loved than she knows. But we will be sure to tell her...

I found out later the next day that the lights flickering and me mentioning my Uncle Ray was actually quite bizarre. My mom called my Aunt Melba Thursday to tell her about the baby and she told her about the lights and me saying I thought it was him. Melba had been having a rough morning Wednesday, really missing Ray. She cried and prayed and wanted a sign from him. He didn't give her one, but he gave me one. She was so happy to hear about the lights and my reaction. I know Ray was there with me that day. Welcoming this sweet baby into the world too. I hope he had a hand in keeping her safe...


Oh... and my favorite nurse? She worked that night. She wasn't my nurse, but she came by to check on me. She held Ryssa. And told me how good of a job I did. She also helped reassure me about some pain I was in, and that I didn't HAVE to take the strong meds they were mentioning for me (they make me sick). I wish she could have been our nurse the whole time, or even for ONE more shift. But oh well. She didn't even have to come visit, and she did. And her wanting to hold Rys melted my heart :)

Less than two weeks left!!

Oh blogger... How I've missed you! Seriously! I miss the days when I could just sit and blog for hours. Now I'm lucky if I am functioning for hours by the time I get home from work. Mostly, I'm not. Mostly, I'm super tired. Or in a lot of pain. But today I am feeling okay. Today I get to blog!

I have some cancer stories to share. One written by my dear friend Mandi, about her dad. He passed away recently, and writing for the blog helped her come to terms with healing. I need to post the story, but I haven't been able to get through the whole thing because I'm naturally emotional and these hormones make it worse and I just turn into a mess every time I read it... I PROMISE it'll be posted soon.
I also have a follow up to a guest post from a few months ago that I need to post. I will hopefully get around to it this week.

I don't have any cancer updates regarding Danny. He has his next appointment scheduled for September. Right before my birthday. It'll be a stressful time for us, I'm sure. But I think things will continue to be great with his health :)


So... Pregnancy update! If you follow along on Facebook, you're already getting pretty constant updates. It's probably annoying you. Sorry if it is!
Last time I posted we had just under 7 weeks left until my due date... It's been so long since I've been on here that THERE IS LESS THAN TWO WEEKS until my due date now!! WHAT?! Where has the time gone? I mean, really.... I feel like we just went through IVF last month!

Miss Rys isn't here yet... Despite a few scares (and yes, they were scares, because it was too early!), she's still snuggled in tight. Okay. That's not entirely true. But she's still in there, that's what I'm trying to say!!

At my last dr appointment, my doc checked me and told me how things are progressing. And, well, progressing we are. Two weeks before I was dilated to 1 and my cervix was getting soft and mushy, the week before I was dilated to 1-2 and my cervix was "very mushy" and Rys was "RIGHT. THERE." This week? Well, this week I was dilated to a full 2, maybe a bit more. My effacement? Yeah, it's done. Can't get any thinner than that. "Paper thin" is what it is. 100%. Done. And Rys? She's so far down into the canal that it's causing all of my constant pain and pressure and there's essentially no way to help it except get her OUT. Doc said "The baby is ready. The baby is done. She's as far as possible. Now we're just waiting on your brain. Your brain needs to release oxytocin. Just a TINY bit. And once it does, you'll start dilating more. And once that starts? The rest is history." So, what are we waiting on? My brain. Unfortunately, my mom came with me to that appointment, so she heard all that, too. So now I am getting pressure to get my mind in this. No more denial for me. No more fighting off the contractions. No more trying to convince her to stay in. She's ready, she's more than ready. The only thing stopping her is my brain which hasn't triggered the release of oxytocin yet. My brain is generally not a problem. My brain is usually really dependable. I don't blame my brain.... Unfortunately everyone else does ;) When the doc had answered some of my mom's questions and asked if I had any, she went to leave. She then came BACK in and told me to make sure I have my bag packed.
My bag was finished up that night.

This weekend Danny and I went and got the curtains for her room's windows. And a piece of wood for under her mattress for the movement monitor. And a cute little box for all the little things that could easily get lost, to put in her stand-alone closet. When we got home, I went through all of her socks and bows and headbands and got them all organized... I came out of the nursery and Danny was rearranging the living room!! He had already started nesting earlier in the week but he kicked it into high gear yesterday. Moving furniture, sweeping. I couldn't sit there and watch, so I started to help by picking some stuff up. Organizing my books. Then after resting for a bit, I went back into the nursery and set up the movement monitor and positioned the video portion so I could see her... Well, so I could see the blanket that I was pretending was her for video-positioning-purposes. I then put all the clips on the curtain that will go around her stand alone closet. Today I ordered another corner piece for the wire curtain for it, per Danny's request. So it'll be a few days before that curtain is up. Maybe her window curtains will be up today though. We shall see.
When I'm done posting  I will play out my lives on Papa Pear on Facebook... And then I think I'll clean the kitchen. I want to get Ryssa's swing/bouncer put together. But I think we'll wait until she's here for that. It'll stay in the living room and I don't want the cats to think it's theirs before she gets here and stakes her claim on it!

That's about it... I'll do the update quiz thing now. And just know, all the answers are good for the last few weeks! :)

How Far Along:  38 weeks... WHOA! Full term!!

Total Weight Gain: Plus THREE.

Maternity Clothes: I've got some clothes from my sister in law, a super soft maternity/nursing dress, and my cozy clothes :)

Stretch Marks: Still none, allow me to knock on some wood ;) 

Sleep: Ohhh I love sleep. Sleeping on one side too long has gotten uncomfortable again though, that whole side gets super sore. And unfortunately my left side is really the only side I'm comfy on. So. It's a pain in the rear... Or more accurately in the hip.   

Best Moment This Week: Getting so much in her room done! And the amazing pedi I treated myself to.  

Miss Anything: Umm... I'm good, thanks!   

Movement: She's been really VERY quiet the last couple days.    

Food Cravings: Everything. All of my favorite things. Anything that doesn't give me awful indigestion (like Taco Grande).  

Anything Making You Queasy or Sick: I get nauseous randomly. And when my contractions are especially painful  

Gender: A wonderfully amazing baby GIRL, Ryssa

Labor Signs: Lots of contractions, but most are random. I had some good strong ones the other night for an hour, every 5-10 minutes. Danny asked if he needed to start the car, but I decided to take a warm bath.... And that put a stop to the contractions. So. Whatever.

Symptoms: A growing baby bump ;)

Belly Button In or Out:  It still hasn't popped ALL the way out :)

Wedding Rings On or Off: On and still loose unless I am hot and swollen 

Happy or Moody Most of the Time: Happy unless you tick me off. Then I stay mad at you for... ever. >>same

Looking Forward To: Meeting baby Rys!!!